There is a community of people who carry an enthusiastic interest in both Broadway and Barbra Streisand. I am a proud member of that group and have been since a very young age. I was so excited when I turned 5 because I was finally able to sing “I’m Five” from Streisand’s My Name is Barbara album. When CD’s came out, my first purchase was Barbara Streisand in Concert . The Secret Garden was the first show I saw on Broadway, drama was already my favorite class, and I had Broadway musical cast albums memorized. One of those scores that I had committed to memory was Funny Girl, a role that was originated, on stage and screen, by the one and only…drum roll…Barbra Streisand. “I’m the Greatest Star” and “People” were regularly on loop in my house, my room and my head. Between frequent visits to New York (where both of my parents are from) and going to schools that prioritized creativity, my early and deep passion for Broadway and theatre was always nourished.
In my early teen years, it became clear that going to a standard, rustic, outdoors summer camp was just not my jam, and I was not going to go as I had every summer previous. I did have plans to participate in a 2-week theatre day camp, but other than that, didn’t know how I would spend my summer, until my mom found a tiny ad in the back of a magazine for the famed Stagedoor Manor Performing Arts Training Center; I did not yet know of its reputation as being the most prolific training ground for budding adolescent theater actors.
Picture me, a 13-year old-theatre nerd from Colorado who flies out to upstate New York for theatre camp. It was pure heaven! Everyone who was there was equally as passionate about Broadway and theatre as I was. What was also true was that the energy there was incredibly competitive, which in a way was warranted considering the extreme talent. At times, I felt out of my league, but loved it so much and went back year after year.
On the first day of my second summer there, I was busy getting unpacked and putting sheets on my bed, waiting for more roommates to arrive when a girl comes in and vivaciously introduces herself. Within 10 minutes my new roommate, Lea Michele shared that she lives in New York City, was Young Cosette in Les Miserables and The Little Girl in Ragtime on Broadway and had been on TV multiple times. I remember feeling a combination of excitement to know someone who has been on Broadway, as well as inadequacy in comparing my experience with hers; she had already accomplished my dream.
As the 3-week session progressed, I remember feeling more and more small and vulnerable around her. At first, her bullying towards me was more subtle and passive-aggressive before developing into more overt tactics; Calling me “Ash-tray”, making fun of my singing voice (something I had shared I was deeply insecure about) behind my back, leaving used menstrual products on the floor of our bathroom and blaming it on me and booing me when I came on stage during an outdoor production of Pippin, which the entire camp witnessed. Thinking back, I can remember how complicated it actually felt. Considering that being on Broadway was the dream (of all dreams) for everybody there, being roommates with Lea gave me automatic status, by association; “Is it true that your roommate was on Broadway?” “What is it like being roommates with Lea?” “Does she tell you stories about Broadway?” If the idea of being “close” to Lea was so intriguing to others, when and how was I going to respond with “She is really mean to me[…] It is hard being her roommate.” I didn’t talk to anyone about it while it was happening and then returned to my regular adolescent existence when I got home.
Almost 10 years later, I was living in New York as an acting student in college when Spring Awakening opened on Broadway, starring the one and only Lea Michele as Wendla. I remember sitting in one of the seats on stage and making eye contact with Lea; it felt a little too close for comfort, but was so fleeting. I continued to listen to the cast album, just like I would with any other show and I was okay. Some years later, Glee premiered with Lea at the center. I watched Glee in its entirety as it has so many nerdy theatre references that I couldn’t resist, and because it was fictional and somewhat outrageous, there was enough distance for me to not feel too activated by watching her. Years later when various Glee cast members started speaking out about the harmful way she treated them, I felt an unexpected sense of solidarity with them and still felt fine. It was a somewhat strange experience for me as Lea became more and more famous, but once again, there was enough distance that it didn’t bother me too much, though it would bring up some challenging memories.
When the news broke that Funny Girl was coming back and it would be starring Beanie Feldstein, I loved it. In my opinion, Beanie is a comedic genius (I had the pleasure of seeing her in Hello Dolly), and by all reports from those who know her, Beanie is a genuinely kind person. The truth is that the production itself didn’t get good reviews, but Beanie bore the brunt of it. A choice was made to revive Funny Girl with Beanie Feldstein at its helm. Beanie, a self-identified fat, queer and Jewish actress, known for her kindness, was under the care of a director and production team, that did not play to her strengths. This is ironic considering that Fanny is known for being one of the first females to play to her humor to compensate for not looking like the desired angelic women of the 1920’s. Worst of all, the production team did not support Beanie or protect her when the reviews came after her. Instead, they did the opposite and cast someone with none of those same identifying categories, who is known for her cruelty and poor treatment of others, replacing Beanie with non-other than: Lea Michele.
When I found this out, I was so angry. I was not okay. Fanny was judged for her appearance and became a star, against the odds, as did Barbra Streisand and the same is true for Beanie. So, when the next person to step into the role lives life on the other side as a bully, that felt wrong. How strange is it that a character (Fanny Brice) who has brought me so much joy and comfort over my lifetime is now fused with someone who has directly caused me pain and struggle? I am troubled by the fact that the Broadway industry further perpetuated the bullying narrative with this casting choice.
I only had to share space with Lea for 3 weeks. The way she treated me was the most severe of them any of the teasing/bullying that I have experienced. If 24 years later, I am still thinking about and hurt by it, what must it be like for those who were severely and chronically bullied? Maybe their bully becomes famous and there are constant reminders in pop culture, and also maybe being bullied is a traumatic experience and there would be life-long reminders, regardless. As a licensed therapist, I work with clients aged 3 through adulthood, and each age group has spoken about and struggled with bullying, demonstrating how pervasive and traumatic bullying is and how desperately it needs to be talked about and processed.
Is Lea an incredibly talented singer? Yes, of course. But, would Fanny have wanted it this way? I would certainly hope not.
Ashley Kleinman Martinez, RDT-BCT, LCAT, LPC is rooted deeply in theatre and the arts, which has become the inspiration and foundation of her life and career choices to this day. Ashley is a Registered Drama Therapist, Board Certified Trainer [of Drama Therapy], Licensed Creative Arts Therapist and Licensed Professional Counselor. Starting her work in New York City and transitioning to her home state of Colorado, Ashley has utilized theatre for the therapeutic treatment of mental health for children, adolescents and families in various setting over the last 15 years; home-based crisis counseling, inpatient psychiatry, domestic violence support, and now in her thriving private practice, Brave Space Counseling & Wellness, LLC where she provides drama therapy to children and adolescents struggling with depression, anxiety, self-esteem and trauma, as well as women with perinatal and new motherhood transitions. Ashley is also an adjunct faculty member in Lesley University’s master’s level Drama Therapy program. While Ashley’s life-goals have shifted significantly since wanting to be a Broadway actress, theatre will always and forever be her guide. To learn more about Ashley and her work, please visit www.bravespacecounseling.org.